It’s a strange fact that being connected to the world makes many of us feel more isolated and alone than ever before. The fact that we all share the airbrushed “perfect” moments of our lives, and rarely delve into the depths of our low points, really only helps to make us feel alone when we’re going through a difficult time. “She’s got 2 adorable kids, she has 2 jobs, keeps a clean home, and she even has time to make bread by hand twice per week! Why can’t I make it through one day without feeling like a failure as a parent?” Well I’m here to tell you that you’re not alone. I’m NOT just my online persona. We all need to remember that none of us post the bad as much as the good. I yell at my children. I hide in the bathroom when I just need a few minutes to myself. I let my house fall into chaos before I summon the energy to clean it all up. I feel like I’m failing my son when he doesn’t learn as quickly as his sister. I feel like I’m failing my daughter when she just wants me to read her a story and I just need her to get away from me for 10 minutes. I feel like I’m failing as a wife when I give all my energy to work and the kids and have nothing left for him. I feel like I should be doing more, but I can’t seem to get the motivation to get off the couch. I take antidepressants. You’re not alone. So the next time you feel like a failure, remember that you’re no more a failure than I am. And I’m a pretty kick-ass lady.
3 Replies to “The isolation of being connected”
You are the greatest!
When A was born, I was going to be the perfect mom. He was a preemie and needed feeding like every 2.5 seconds. I was always so tired I thought I’d die. I talked to my mom and her response was, “Well you wanted a baby!” How encouraging! Scott and I learned as we went along and he was the sweetest little boy…then Dami came along (after my infertility doctor said to call when i wanted another baby) and I was so overwhelmed. Damon was the baby from heaven. He slept, he ate, he pooped, almost everything on schedule. He was almost like a sloth baby (except for the pooping once a week.) But if I could go back and do it the same way again, I’d do it in a heartbeat.
I envy you…you work, you seem to do “everything” and I look back at when my kids were little and I was just thrilled if they slept through the night.