Hilariously horrible

How can kids be SO funny and SO sassy at the same time? It’s an amazing defense mechanism. Some examples from this morning. Keep in mind that we’ve only been up for about 3 hours.

• I got out of the shower this morning to find that Emmett had destroyed the puzzle we were building (not a big deal, because we just started the other day). He then proceeded to pick it up one piece at a time. 1000 pieces. And he gave an enthusiastic “thank you!” after handing me each piece. It was funny in an “omg, how is he still going” kind of way. (And no, I didn’t let him do the whole thing that way. We’d still be up there.)
• Madeline asked for raisins to be added to her trail mix for second breakfast (because she’s a hobbit). I then found her picking out all the raisins and throwing them about the living room. When I walked in, she turned quickly, hands behind her back, and said “how can I help you, Mom?”
• I was kneading dough. Madeline was rubbing her head on my legs like a weirdo. Almost tipped me over. “My hair’s so crazy now, Mom!”
• Currently, Madeline is at the bottom of the stairs and Emmett is at the top. She keeps turning off the light, Emmett keeps turning it on. “Can you guys knock it off already?! You’re driving me crazy” “No, mom. We’re just fine. It’s not crazy. Thank you!”
• They were playing a game earlier, and they were arguing to the point of hitting and crying about whether you count to 3 or 5 before pulling the lever. Emmett insisted on consulting the instructions. After careful examination, he determined “Toy Story,” to which Madeline replied “oh, ok.” At least they know what they’re talking about.